I think we all know that is it far easier to “talk the talk” than “walk the walk.” Personally, I really try to pay attention to this. I mean, it would not be cool for me to spouting off all this sage advice and wisdom and not be coming from that. And I’m not perfect by any means. However, I have to say, I am sincere and for the most part, do a pretty good job in this department. And…the past few weeks, I realized that I’ve been missing something. For me, it is the missing ingredient for living fully from the Balance Point where nothing is needed and nothing needs to be taken away. That ingredient is knowing when to ask for support and accepting support fully as it is given with gratitude.
For the past two weeks, I’ve been dealing with my mother being in the hospital. She’s 88 years old and has been very sick. In fact, her health seems to be declining. I thought I would handle this as I’ve handle every other situation like it — just put my head down and push through it. Come out on the other side and move on. This modus operandi has officially taken its toll. Earlier last week, I realized that I’m just not as physically resilient as I once was. I saw how this pattern of “muscling through” doesn’t work for me now.
This morning on one of my doggy walks I realized that when people ask me how they can help, it makes me feel more helpless because I don’t know the answer to the question. I don’t know and it makes me feel like something more is being required of me that I just can’t handle in the moment. I then get wrapped up in trying to figure out how to make him or her feel that they can support. And this in turn is even more stressful, also revealing a pattern to make sure everyone is happy. This is one crazy scene.
So, as I told myself the truth about all of this and took responsibility for my creating and perpetuating it I realized the answer to the question, “How can I help?” The answer is simple, just send Love, pray, meditate – whatever form it takes for you. Just send Love. Feel it in your Heart. If you have a prayer group – say a special prayer. If you meditate – feel completion and wholeness during your meditation. Just send Love. That’s all we have and are in the end anyway.
P.S. In really getting it this morning, suddenly other ways people can help have been coming through. My son is graduating with honors this weekend from VA Tech. I have been obviously worried with attending his graduation and leaving my mother. I’ve asked a good friend to be with her while we’re away. And the wonderful woman who runs the Assisted Living unit where my mother resides will also be checking in on her. It’s all perfect and I’m so grateful for this Missing Ingredient.